Quick post

It has been one of those weeks where I have thought of a couple of blog topics, but haven't had the sense to put them down in any substantial way.
The only thought I have some small things. I have started running, got new bedroom furniture, and got my haircut.
I realize this is a non post. More substance to come.
S out

Roller coaster

Sitting down after a long day, actually a long week, I find myself reluctant to type. I promised to try and post twice a week, so here goes.
It is funny how as I get older, or maybe since I became a dad, that tired comes in different flavors now. I seem to remember being tired in university and high school was pretty much was either mental tired or physical exhaustion. Now there seems to be more categories to apply. Happy tired, emotional drained,  achy tired, too tired to sleep, tired of queuing, tired of routine....etc.
I have been developing a theory that despite the young adult drama my life was actually pretty easy and this new menu of weariness is because I have a more engaged life. A sign of experience that my body struggles more to cope.
I like this to the alternative to the thought of it just being the fact I'm old. I would concede that I should exercise more.
This topic hit me because I struggle this week with sleeping, IKEA, projects at home, writing, work, the news cycle, organizing some events. It didn't really hit me until I tried to explain a game to someone at game night. I am a little brain weary.
Fortunately next week promises to be a bit better. Still I think I will start going to go to bed earlier.
I am done. Good night

Spring is here!

Toronto might not have the warmest weather, but the birds have arrived, the trees have decided to bud, and squirrels are attempting to find food. It is also very, very wet. Therefore Spring is here!

When I was younger, Spring was not one of my favorite seasons. I am one of the autumn people. That is not to say I'm a Halloween sort of guy, rather I am a lover of falling leaves, air with that dry, cold nip, the rustling floor of a forest, fall festivals, and the underlying thought that the end of the year holidays are approaching.

Spring has recently been re-evaluated in light of my daughter's arrival. A child sees the seasons differently and they shape and warp your life accordingly. Old maxims fall away as you are forced to deal with new truths. Winter is now judged more harshly; the park is not available as the sun sets so quickly; multiple layers of clothing bring weariness and battles; cabin fever afflicts all people under five. Oddly, the start of Winter is great with many happy memories, but by the end of January, children seem to decide that the cold season has gone long enough. These new facts have given Spring a different look in my eyes. I now find that I look forward to the longer days, the diminishing layers, the green parks, the farmer's markets.  Spring and Summer are simply easier for children, or rather their parents.

Another plus for Spring is that I have learned to cook, and farmer's markets become alive again in Spring. I find excitement in the colours of berries, veggies, and fruit in the market. I realize that I have been getting these things in the grocery store (and in winter it is my favorite part of the grocery store to go to), but there just is more of it, and it's fresh.

In short, I raise a glass to Spring, but remain steadfast in saying that Fall is still the best.

What have I been upto?

I can honestly say it has been productive. I can't even say that I am working away from the ipad. I have been doing some experimenting to move from a passive consumer of content on the tablet to a creator who engages with the greater world. It was not a straight path, especially with the setting up of twitter feeds, but I feel I am moving forward. A brief recap of the Grande experiment!

Writing

I have been experimenting with the blogsy app, which is a very excellent blog poster and I recommend anyone to pick it up if they have an ipad. I currently am working on three blogs and one tumblr, but I can do all the posting through blogsy. It allows you to drop in pictures, videos, and links with a gesture, and tends to take away the excuse that the tools are in the way of the art.

The other writing has been done through iwriter. A smart, simple interface where your word processing experience has been distilled to the essence of writing; getting letters typed onto a page. All distractions have been taken away and so one is left with the work being the only hurdle to face. Currently, I am crafting through a novel there. My first novel project of any substance since Jericho the Ungermly Germ (which quietly begs for a rewrite....maybe in summer). About 16,000 words in right now and emotionally I feel I am almost done the early setup and am ready to get into the main plot.

I am taking a page from Becky, and am going to attempt to send out more fan letters. There is a lot of things I like, some being by artists early in their careers, and I should really let them know they are awesome (which is probably a good life lessons-- you should always find the awesome in others and remind them of it). I plan to do one this week for Lexxy Douglas, an illustrator whose work is amazing and who created a wonderful strip in the last elimination round of Strip Search (the only reality show I have ever watched).

 

Drawing

The biggest play/experiment that I have been getting drawing on the ipad. I have been mostly using two apps, Sketchbook Pro and Paper. Whereas Sketchbook Pro is quite expansive

To see where I'm at, it is at one of my other blogs, Trying Art with Friends , personally I feel I am still going through my awkward stage of drawing on the ipad, but I have found the ipad drawing tools exciting and look forward to getting better with them.

Cleaning

The last one will have no presence on the Internet, but we have been actively cleaning out condo in preparation of our second child. I am a pack rat and an interest moth, so this is a very stressful process as I find memories or tools for desires of my past that are hard to part with. That said, I didn't have as much trouble getting rid of the old receipts and to do lists, its more the books and idea papers are harder. The compromise is that we are going digtial for books (1,000 digital books take up no space) and converting my notes and writing to digital format. It will be the "grinding" task of 2013.

Gaming

I have been a little busy to get any major game sessions, but I have got some Love letter in, as well as a couple games of Hive. I am trying to convince my brother to run a game of Twilight Imperium. I will be going to Snakes and Lattes later this month probably.

 

Finally there was a crusie in there, an uptick of work at work, a GGK book signing, and general living. I would say I have been fairly productive, despite some side tracks watching You Tube television shows, reading twitter feed, plants vs. zombie, and Bastion.

That the start of Spring in a nutshell, a promise of more posts (as always)

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Many Days since car sickness

It's been a week, but I can safely say that I am no longer car sick. Actually I am quietly sitting at home relaxing after a long week. It has been a bit of a slog getting back in a normal state of affairs. Nausea really is a problem when you try to do mobile blogging.

Whistler was excellent, one of those places you feel you could live if you had tons of money. Mountains are better to experience in person. I am also a sucker for a town where you can walk everywhere. I am sure it is different for people who actually live there, but as a tourist you tend to believe everyone in Whistler skiis about there day.

Aside from the expensive food, I was about to do a tree top walk in the valley between the mountains. What was more exciting was trying out biathlon at the Olympic park. It's a combination of cross country and rifle shooting. I was surprised how much I like cross country skiing and how I turned out to be a pretty good shot. Mind you there is no recoil on the biathlon rifle, so it did have a video game field. It is one of my favorite sports to watch during the Olympic Games, and having now tried it I now have a greater appreciation of the distance involved.

In constrast, the tree top hike fit like an old glove. I always like a good hike and how could a hike on a series of platforms snaking through the tree tops of an ancient forest go wrong? One side fact that I need to check out is that the guide said Whistler is trying to become a sustainable community 2020. They seem to take the environment more seriously here, but it might be due to the fact there ecosystems are still intact versus Ontario's struggling green.

The oddest part of my Whistler trip is that I didn't do any downhill skiing. What is also surprising is that I don't feel I missed anything by not going down the slope. At least my daughter did in her ski school.

I recommend checking it out.

S

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Surviving whistler

Long time since last post...blah blah. Right moving on. Currently sitting on a bus heading back to Vancouver after a couple of days in Whistler. It has been a fun and physically tiring holiday. Did cross country skiing for the first time as well as biathlon.
bus moving again. I will post my thoughts later.

Three missed debates

I realize that I tend to be a broken record, but I must confess again to being busy. Or rather I have a lot of items I want to get done and therefore I prioritize. When you start making lists, then something has to be at the bottom. In the 2013, that was engagement with the Internet. I have largely been a passive consumer of the Internet this year. It's not really a bad thing, as there are lots of people more than willing to fill the void of my silence and, as my dad says, the Internet is a piggy bank of everyone's two cents.

Still there were some topics that floated up over 2012 that give me a small pinch of regret that I have not explored further; grit in the boot that needles my mind as I go about my day. In view of what else I have done and discussed, I will not lose sleep over it. Yet they are questions and I'm a curious sort of guy. I'll look into them more deeply in 2013, but I will lightly capture the questions here.

1: Prescriptive vs descriptive art; this one is probably only topic that has cut through all circles of friends, coworkers, acquaintances, websites viewed this year. It tends to start with the statement what art is not, usually in the context of why something is not a "good" novel/movie/video game/tv show, then proceeds with a diagnosis that said item is not a novel/movie/video game/tv show. The conclusion is a prescription of what a novel/movie/video game/tv show is. I appreciate the dislike of something due to taste (of which there is no accounting) and dislike of something due to quality (in the broad sense of plot holes, inconsistent dialogue, poor wardrobe choices, lack of budget) but I have been unable to reconcile the idea that a novel is not a novel if the author says its a novel (and it is a fictional story in book format) or tv show is not tv show (when it is filmed and shown installments). How to determine the quality of art without being blinded by taste is a problem I have not come to grips with. The other wrench in the works is whether a piece of art that doesn't connect with me is a matter of good/bad art or simply that I, the recipient, and the artist have knowledge/life experiences too far apart to connect; ships passing in the night. Where is the failure then?

2: How to talk about the news. If I could say one thing that wore on my soul, perhaps since 2006, is that it is harder and harder to find discussions of policy. This might be a failure on my part, but most of my Internet news seems to be more a lengthy political ad campaign and spin then a discussion of what the issue is. The rhetoric seems quite substantial and repetitive with little sense of history or memory. The barometer for me has been the pundit pages. The quality of journalism there seems to be worsening, where I can predict the end of the article by paragraph two. They don't seem to inform or challenge in any real sense, but give a badly written argument that doesn't really force me to think (whether I agree with it or not). I am not sure what the solution is, but thankfully the straight journalism seems to the same as it ever was,

3: The alternative to consumerism this is really a research question, if we stop buying things, experience, and real estate, what is everyone to do? Jobs consolidate, transform, and disappear with technology putting a lot of pressure of the world job market, but as long as people what "stuff" there will be jobs. The current consumption is putting the environment in dire straits (both the built environment and the natural one) and we really need to think about how to consume less. But what is the alternative? I often have this thought when I hear a priest or writer rail against consumerism. It feels like a knee jerk reaction, with little thought that to the number of people who touch a single product in some way to get it to market. Again, how do 6 billion have jobs and not destroy the planet?

That's it. Three questions I hope to look at in 2013. Provided time allows.

S

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The rhythm of life

It is weird to get of the start of December. There is a sense of dread that when I consider the past 365 days at the end of the year and worry that it will not all add up to a positive. This is a knee jerk reaction as careful thought reveals quite a full and interesting year.

I traveled to the Caribbean on a cruise ship. A jam packed week of sun, Caribbean history, relaxation, and fun with my daughter. I saw San Juan for the first time and scuba dived for the tenth time in my life (slowly but surely my experience grows). This was at the start of the year, the other bookend of travel was Las Vegas to celebrate a friend's wedding anniversary. I had been to Vegas ten years ago and was surprised by how much it has changed. Still has a lot of good food.

In between these trips, I held a cheese party, had our kitchen renovated, went it my first ever fan expo, got into board games, had a bathroom renovated, continued the 250 pages or less book club, started board game nights, read 20 books, got my child use to going to school, was vegan for a month, saw three plays, learned a bunch of stuff about my iPad, wrote 10,000 words of a novel (so far), and occasionally exercised.

My world seemed parallel to a world of the us election, the Syrian civil war, the toronto mayor fiasco. There is a sense that the world is working towards a new consensus, or perhaps I am old enough to see the shift sands one's view of the world is built on.

These are the big things, what can't be captured here, is the tons of little moments. The small revelations, the little observations, the simple laughs or smiles and slip in and out of most days. The times that only matter to you. If you summed all these you would have a collection of short stories, not a novel.

In the end, all this adds up to a good year and quite a challenge to top in 2013. It will be fun to try.

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Walking through the Goon Squad Galley

I don't know if it is a statement on my exhaustion, or in a better light a statement on my empathy, I find myself fence sitting a lot more than I use to. I would like to say it's because I am thinking more critically, but I worry that my exhaustion is resulting in lazy circluar thinking. The sort where you shrug your shoulders and say "only God knows the truth" or some other vague "let's not think about it" statement.

To combat this, I have been trying to focus more on what I am doing, reading a book, playing a game, having a conversation. I really want to be more engaged, or at least get myself above the dreaded "pseudo intellectual" or "bar stool blow hard" level. I would rather be a rank amateur; thoughtful but not getting paid to be so. The most recent challenge to my striving for mental decisiveness has been a book called "a visit from the goon squad" by Jennifer Egan.

Goon squad is a very cinematically structured book. A collection of short stories/vignettes over time that circle two characters who worked in the New York music industry. They are only main characters in of the two early stories, but serve as the sun around which the other stories orbit. I mention movies as the stories come together like those collage films, Love Actually being one example, where you have a bunch of seemingly unrelated scenes that tie together around a theme, or a character. I should also mention that it is non linear.

As with the montage film, goon squad has a variety of styles, defined by narrative style rather than cinematography or lighting. The narrative styles are a mix of reliable/unreliable, first person, second person, etc; a potpourri of style.

Now we come to my dilemma. In the circle of readers I find myself in, the feelings towards this book is split. A definite love/hate dynamic that doesn't seem to have a lot of grey. Which is the problem, as I find myself in the grey, or rather wishing to be in the grey, but am confronted with to passionate lists pro and con from my fellow reader. Worse, depending who I am with, I take the other side, trying to force the consensus back to the middle.

I know one could argue that this is a matter of taste where they can be no winners, only losers. Yet, I feel there is an answer to the question "is it a good book?". I am finding it elusive, leaving me hiding on the fence. I have thought a lot about this book, trying to get past other's objections/praise and find what I think and whether it make sense. Create a clear picture of the book in my mind without over thinking it. I humbly present where I finally settled down.

The Goon squad is not a "moving" novel, it does not have a strong current running through or a narrative that forces the reader along. It feels more fragile. To read through it, left me feeling as though I had walked though a photo or modern art exhibit. A theme presented to me at the entrance to a white hall with simple wood floors, dotted by makeshift walls upon which the pieces hang. Each piece unique,but solitary, despite being only a few feet from each other and supposedly linked by the aforementioned theme. To walk too quickly through the gallery, you see nothing that is there, but to linger too long you see what is not there.

The Goon squad refers to time and it's relentless crushing of one's story. Crueler than death, bringing despair through your desires and dreams. The story give a sense of being all that remains, what fragments have been captured before it will all fade as things do. This is conjecture as, most of the characters are not Patrick Stewart and lack the philosophical gravitas to muse on the life's journey though time.

This is all really good, but I have not addressed my reservations. There are many jarring moments in the book. Power point presentations that are not really power point presentations, second person narratives, dropped characters, questionable futures, stereotypes. I found myself kicked out of stories because of the cliches. It felt very movie like again. A music producer loses his mojo, multiple broken marriages, New York minute of fame, the PR suit, secretaries being stronger than their bosses, rich people struggling for status. I remember thinking that I was reading more of an idea of New York than actual New York.

Some of these conflicts were body of knowledge issues. I have seen the power point presentations made by children and they are more photo and graphic heavy. The text speak was jarring as auto correct is destroying the dialect. The mega corps and high society seemed off note for me. A sense that more time was spent on style. It made me feel like the awkward kid at the party who doesn't understand what teenage cool is.

I end with fragility. The book really felt like crafted glass at point, demanding careful suspension of disbelief or trust less it the whole project will collapse on itself. To those that dislike the book, this seems to be their chief complaint. A sense that this was an exercise in narrative styles then a story, or collection of characters. This I think is the crux of my fence sitting. There is a lot of wonderful in this book, taken as whole, the experimenting representing the fickle nature of our life's archive. My wish had been for more depth in characters, but then that might have shattered the whole thing. This was a book about the silences that make music.

Is it a good book? I would say it is an okay book. It made me ponder structure. The characters did briefly touch me, but felt more silver screen than real. A book for my head but not my heart. A great book should do both.

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Tacile

Recently I have been obsessed with board games. I haven't had a chance to play them so much as the internet has kept me fed with videos of game play, podcasts of reviews and gaming theory. I have picked up two new games that I hope to write about in the future. I also have some plans for some game nights that will also provide some fodder for the blog.

S asked me why I have gotten so interested recently in board games. What trigger my mind to focus on it. The kernel of it is probably Wil Wheaton's new web series Tabletop. A show where low level celebrities play board games.
Taking a step back and giving it some more thought, I believe it's my missing the social element that video games use to have for me which is driving me to the dice and cards. When I was younger, it was not unreasonable to expect a bunch of the guys to get together and play a video game from start to finish one weekend. Or to sit around playing a video game while talking about the our individual video gaming sessions. It was as if we were hunters sitting in our Africian lodge to discuss our latest exploits.

It might be the passage of time, the chains of responsibility I chose to add to my life, or the fact there simply too many good games out there, that my video game experiences have become more solitary. I have made attempts to play games at the same time as others. But I simply don't have the time, or rather the blocks of time, to complete a Japanese rpg like I use to.

That is not to say that one's time could not be swallowed in board games. The Internet has shown me the dark rabbit hole I cannot enter. But I don't think it matters as much with board games. The social play of a board game is a means to itself. It doesn't feel like a medium of long drawn out thought, but rather puzzles to be mulled over with others. The biggest difference For a board game is that you play the table, the players around you. Video games haven't quite mastered that yet.

I newly back into the hobby, so I assume my feelings towards it will change with time. I am having a game night tonight at snakes & lattes. Should be fun!

S

 

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